Jeff Minick: With all due respect

Comedian Rodney Dangerfield operated in the world of “The Godfather,†the film about criminals who stress family, loyalty, manhood, and respect. The movie's repeated emphasis on respect – “I said that I would see you because I had heard that you were a serious man, to be treated with respect,†Don Corleone says to another criminal, Sollozzo – inspired Dangerfield to add a signature line to his act which boosted both the laughs and his fame. 

Here are three samples: 

“I tell ya when I fly, I don't get no respect. I took one of those cheap flights, no frills. I finished eating and had to do the dishes.â€Â 

“I don't get no respect. I called Suicide Prevention. They tried to talk me into it.â€Â 

“When I was a kid I got no respect. When I went on a roller coaster, my old man told me to stand up straight.â€Â 

Comedy aside, almost all of us want to be treated with respect, yet all too often that consideration is missing in action. 

Honoring Ourselves and Others 

There are dozens of articles rightly promoting the value and importance of self-respect and respect for others. Many of these contain lists suggesting ways to honor and appreciate our own worth and extend that regard to those around us: family and co-workers, friends and strangers. 

Be polite, these lists say. Become a good listener. Do the right thing even when it comes with a cost. Say “I'm sorry†when you've made a mistake or done something wrong. Treat people with care and understanding.    

There's more, but you get the idea. But here are three more suggestions that appear less commonly. 

Respect the Rank, Not the Man 

This one comes straight from the military, but it's sorely neglected by the rest of us today. When we carelessly tear into Joe Biden or Donald Trump, attacking them on a personal level, we are often guilty of tearing down the office of the president. When some call for packing the Supreme Court because they loathe certain justices, they are taking jackhammers to one of the foundations of our republic. 

All too often we do the same in our personal relationships. Rightly or not, for instance, we despise the boss, gossip about him, and so damage the very organization for which we're working. 

Knock Off the Griping 

Chronic bellyaching erodes the respect of others. No one enjoys having coffee with an Eeyore, that character from the Winnie-the-Pooh books who is borderline depressive. 

Twenty years ago, a kid named Luke was enrolled in the seminars I taught to homeschoolers. That summer he'd undergone treatment for cancer, surgery plus chemo, and he came to class looking like the victim of a concentration camp, pale, bone-skinny, and subdued. Yet Luke always arrived prepared for class, and never once did I hear him complain about the ordeal he'd undergone. Most of the students in class had no idea about his condition. Luke's silent, stoic fortitude won him my highest respect. 

Go the Extra Step 

Here the old story of the Good Samaritan applies. A man beaten by robbers is left by the side of the road. A passing priest followed by a Levite offer no help, but a Samaritan, despised by these men as an enemy and heretic, stops, binds the man's wounds, and gets him to an inn for his safe recovery. 

It's then that the Samaritan takes the extra step. He pays the innkeeper for the man's bed and board, promising to pay more if needed when he returns. That extra step cements the respect we already feel for the Good Samaritan. 

In 2010, the Roncalli junior varsity softball team out of Indianapolis, undefeated in over two years, was playing an inner-city team, Marshall Community. Largely unfamiliar with the game, Marshall players had arrived on the field missing gear and clearly unskilled in pitching, hitting, and fielding the ball. In just an inning and a half, the Marshall pitcher had already walked nine Roncalli batters. Marshall was clearly headed for a defeat of epic proportions. 

Until Roncalli decided to forfeit the game, thereby shattering its pristine record. 

Instead of pounding Marshall, these Good Samaritans from Roncalli spent the rest of the afternoon teaching their opponents the fundamentals of softball, how to square away at the plate, how to field fly balls and grounders, how to protect the bases. 

And then came the extra step. At the end of this amazing session, Roncalli Coach Jeff Traylor asked his team's parents for donations of money and used softball equipment for the benefit of the Marshall team. Hearing of this remarkable story of sportsmanship and bonding, several corporations also stepped in and offered help. 

Both teams that day both earned and deserved respect, Roncalli for its act of generosity, Marshall for possessing the humility to take hold of this welcoming hand. 

As we can see, avoiding Dangerfield's “I don't get no respect, no respect at all!†is pretty simple. Respect ourselves by doing the right thing, respect the humanity of others, and like Roncalli and Marshall, we come out as winners.

Jeff Minick is a father of four and grandfather to many. A former history, literature, and Latin teacher, Jeff now writes prolifically for The Epoch Times, American Essence Magazine, and his Substack.

This culture article was made possible by The Fred & Rheta Skelton Center for Cultural Renewal, a project of 1819 News. To comment on this article, please email [email protected]. The views and opinions expressed here are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the policy or position of 1819 News.

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